shameless, childish VENT

When I moved to Rexburg in June of 2008, life was great for the first few months while I lived off my tax returns and hung out with my kids all day every day. Then I started looking for a job. Then, life sucked, from that moment on, till the day I moved home in April of 2010.

One bright spot in my Rexburg life was Lee. I started working at Deseret Industries in April of 2009, three months after I'd been laid off from my first horrid Rexburg job. All jobs in Rexburg are horrid. The first employee I met there was Lee. He was the "Developmental Specialist." Lee is married and has beautiful kids and there was never anything sexual or romantic or otherwise improper, not even remotely, in our relationship. But, there was something special, I believed. D.I. is kinda a place for kids who need help in some form or another. I thought I was one of the few normal folks who worked there, but as it happened, I needed help. I was an emotional, psychological mess. Lee was just the person for such a mess as he has an education in psychology, and a naturally compassionate disposition.

Some months when I lived in Rexburg were so very, very dark, that I really think Lee may have saved my life, in a way or two. He listened like no one else EVER had. I believed him when he told me I was important, and lovable, and that he cared.

And, you know, the act of "unfriending" on Facebook shouldn't mean a thing, except that it does, when it's by someone you believed when he said he cared.

maybe caring was just part of his job description.

As stupid as it is, it leaves me to wonder what the heck my purpose in Rexburg was. I spent 2 miserable years there. And now, one of the only reasons I look back on Rexburg with any degree of fondness disappears from my life? I did nothing for Rexburg and it did almost nothing for me.

Thank goodness for my dearest friend Eileen. If not for her, I'm pretty sure Rexburg would be the biggest waste of my life to date.

I wonder why Lee unfriended me. But I don't want to know.